Cancer and Pregnancy: Choosing Life

During the summer of 2020, in the middle of a worldwide pandemic, and at the age of 30, I was diagnosed with breast cancer.  Two days later I found out I was pregnant. Although I was thankful to be blessed with a pregnancy, it was also a terrifying time. I did not know how this pregnancy would or would not affect my treatment options.

For the first time, the pro-abortion argument, “what about when the pregnancy affects the mother’s health?” became real to me.  Does this apply to me? Am I going to make a life altering decision based on my pro-life beliefs?

My OB was the first to bring up ‘termination’. Shocked to find out I was pregnant and had cancer, she told me I should consider getting some prenatal genetic testing done to see if this was a viable pregnancy.  She explained if my pregnancy was not viable or ideal, we could terminate it to make sure I had all my treatment options readily available without the complication of pregnancy.    

With my first child I had declined prenatal genetic testing because I knew there were no test results which could change my birthing plans. I was also worried about false-positives and the fear they could cause.  I would have the baby no matter what. If my child was to be born with a genetic abnormality, we would figure it out and accept what God had given us.  This second pregnancy, although complicated with cancer, was no different.

I was seven weeks pregnant when I had my first breast surgery. My medical team was so careful and reassured me over and over they were going to do everything possible to care for me and the seven-week-old life inside me. The medical team congratulated me on my pregnancy and reassured me that I was in the best hands. While in the pre-operating room, I couldn’t help but think about how a baby at seven weeks is so tiny, about the size of a coffee bean. I thought about how so many babies’ lives are ended at this same gestational age. *A study from 2016 showed that about 65% of abortions in the U.S. occurred during the 8th week of pregnancy or earlier. The lives ended in those abortions were no different than the life which was growing inside me. The only difference I could think of was that my baby was wanted. I wondered if the same medical staff who congratulated me on my pregnancy would also think it was ok to end the life inside me. The life they were currently striving to preserve.

I found it ironic that women are required to take a pregnancy test in pre-op to make sure they are not unknowingly pregnant before going into a surgery; yet as soon as the surgery is over, they can schedule an abortion if they choose. The test is done using a urine sample. My cup of urine sat at the end of my hospital bed for an awkward amount of time. Each staff member commented on how they could get it tested, but once I notified them I was certainly pregnant, they turned their attention elsewhere. So there my urine sat.

For the most part the surgery was successful. It was a full mastectomy on my left side. My breast was gone, and I wouldn’t be able to breastfeed with that side, but an ultrasound assured us our baby was healthy and growing. Pathology showed chemotherapy was not needed, and the cancer had not spread to any lymph nodes.  A few weeks after surgery I was surprised when my surgeon called to inform me that a detailed pathology report showed the surgical margins were not clear.  This means cancer cells were found very close or on the border of the tissue they removed, and ultimately, I needed another surgery or radiation to make sure all the cancer cells were gone and could not grow.

I learned, for the most part, surgeries and some forms of chemotherapy are safe during pregnancy. However, radiation and hormone therapy are not considered safe during pregnancy. I had already endured one surgery and my team was concerned another surgery would be too stressful for my baby. I didn’t need chemotherapy, and radiation was not an option while pregnant. My cancer was a hormone fed cancer and I needed hormone blocking therapy to deprive the cancer of its ability to grow. However, my baby also needed my hormones to grow. Because of this, essential treatments had to wait until after the baby was born. 

It was during this conversation my surgeon asked if I still wanted to continue with the pregnancy. There were two very different routes I could take. If I were to terminate my pregnancy, we would do another surgery, radiation, and then start me on an antiestrogen drug right away. This would be the more assertive cancer fighting path. If I chose to continue my pregnancy, then we would take the “wait-and-see” approach.  

I did not need to think about this for long. I had already been trying to protect the life inside me and there was no way I would end it now.

I continued with my pregnancy, but the “wait-and-see” approach resulted in my cancer returning when I was 36 weeks pregnant.  My cancer had come back and was more aggressive. I now needed chemotherapy. I was induced into labor and delivered my daughter. A few short weeks later I started chemotherapy with my newborn at home. I had another surgery when she was 6 months old and learning to roll. When she was 8 months old, and learning to crawl, I had 6 weeks of daily intense radiation which caused painful burns and scars. I had my last injection of an immunotherapy drug to finish my active treatment around her 1^st birthday.

I am here today with a happy, healthy 2-year-old and I’m proud to say I’m cancer free and done with most treatments. I chose sacrifice. I postponed treatments and yes, I experienced suffering, but both our lives were preserved. 2021 was a hard year for my family.

I still think about the day I realized I was pregnant. It was clear to me God was blessing us with a beautiful, new life in the midst of a terrible disease. To do anything other than postpone my treatment would have been selfish. Choosing termination would put myself and my life before my daughter’s – the opposite of motherly love.

In motherhood we make sacrifices. We sacrifice our body, our energy, our time. True love is sacrificial. 1 Corinthians 13 talks about true agape love. Agape love is not concerned with self. Agape love desires the good of others.  We are told to love one another and emulate Christ (Ephesians 5:1-2). I chose to love the life inside me more than ease, comfort, and preservation of my own life.  The ultimate sacrificial love was displayed by Christ on the cross. He lived a life of perfection and then died a gruesome death – taking the place for us and our sin.

But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8

But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed. Isaiah 53:5

I could write on and on, and give many more details from my story. I learned so much these last three years about suffering, faith, love, compassion, and sacrifice. I have been told one day I’m going to look back and feel thankful for the trial. I am not all the way there yet. However, I am truly thankful for my sweet daughter, Abigail Joy. I cannot imagine our family or a life without her. She came with the cancer diagnosis and the two couldn’t be separated, so in fact: I am thankful for cancer.   

https://www.statista.com/statistics/1071200/gestational-age-abortions-us-distribution/

Thank you, Tiffany, for sharing your story on this blog! For those who want to know more or may be going through this same journey, Tiffany shared her experience in real time through her Youtube channel.